How to survive Engineering Colleges in TamilNadu for knowledge seeking honest students

WARNING : This guide does not offer any guarantee that the underlying methods will work successfully . All the below mentioned techniques are to performed only at the risk of the practitioner . Possible damages might include permanent brain damage , a loss of morality and the reasons for classifying self as a human-being. I am in no way responsible for the effects or aftermaths after following the guide.


Advice 1:
Wear full arm shirts , Cotton Pants , Leather shoes and belt . Look as tidy as you can.Oil and comb the hair and wear glasses even if you have perfect vision.

Advice 2:
Never question the staff . Each and every word spoken by them is 24 Carat Gold. Catch them in a bowl if you can. Write them down in 5 inks . Cherish those words like the memories of your mothers hugs.

Advice 3:
Questioning makes you dumb . You question a person's authority by asking doubts.Never make that fatal error. If done punishments may include arrears, low marks,dismissal from class, a loss of attendance and some public humiliation.

Advice 4:
Never think beyond what is asked for . That is a sign of arrogance . It makes you seem as if you have a pumpkin for a head . It shows that you are a show-off intending to illuminate people with knowledge. Under tradition it is illegal and is a serious offense .

Advice 5:
In case you are asked a question, never answer back . Its called "Back answering" .Wikipedia defines it as the wrong answer given when a question is asked where the correct and the only answer is a profuse apology and possibly tears. Again it is a display of arrogance and haughtiness.So never make that mistake . Remain mum and nod your head like a Doll.

Advice 6:
It is impolite to discuss subject matters in class. They want perfect silence . Even if it meas doing nothing.People will no tolerate if you discuss algorithms in the class.You can scribble on the paper , sleep with eyes open yet still cant discuss stuff inside the class.Discussion is a way of propogation of knowledge which is against the fundamental ethos of an engineering college.

Advice 7:
Praise the teachers. Teachers are next to parents in the hierarchy of worship. They never make mistakes and are perfect in just about everything.It is a sin even to think wrong about them.They strive every second for your betterment and your betterment only . They sacrificed a life and their morality for the sake of students and each of them deserve a temple to be built .They are not to made fun of or abused.They can impose their will on just about anything and we are all humble,willing servants of them.

Advice 8:
Back-Stab friends.Its okay.Nothing Big.You come to a college to gain marks and get place in a Big company like TCS,infosys,Wipro etc.With a 9+ in every semester you are awesome and demi-god like.Submit assignments ahead of schedule , steal programs and modify stuff to get ahead of others.Convince the teacher you are the only real human-being in the class.Others are barely Sentinel.College is where you show your people manipulation and Begging skills.Cry for marks , beg and steal.

Advice 9:
Dont waste time in labs.The only serve to increase your practical knowledge.Instead concentrate on rote theory.never worry about implementation.Just knowing stuff like that exists is more than enough.The honorable staff's limit of teaching is the holy grail.Anything beyond it is forbidden.Lab sessions distract you from mugging up the next 10000 pages of your textbooks.They help you find out how to cope with real life problems that can be dangerous.For your health's sake never learn them.They are Satanic.

Advice 10:
Carry a letter always.Just about anything requires an apology.Including your existence.You need an apology just to get into the college. And one to go to the toilet .

Advice 11:
Last but not the least.Exams.Carry 10 colour pens. and a glitter pen . and a fancy ruler.Underline Commas,periods and hyphens.Never write anything useful.Write only in paragraphs and not points.Draw mickey mouse cartoons where you feel there is a blank space.
Use the following color scheme:
Title --- Black
Sub Title --- Green
Bulleting --- Pink
Underline --- Cyan
border --- Yellow
Diagrams --- Gray or Orange.
Actual content maybe written in blue or left blank. it is the least important of all steps.

Along With these 11 commandments enter the college with just a single thought in the mind :"Its a temple . Learn to respect it and obey without questioning . Its the pathway to heaven and what lies beyond it in the textbook ;Page no:127"